why?

why must you taste so good?

you are fake and fattening, but i love you.

I adore him

Sweet, hilarious, loving, anal (he does not like being called that), predictable/unpredictable, likes boring elevator-like jazz music, keeps me on my toes, hardworking, the sweetest father, very lame magazine reader (CFO, Accounting Magazines, Wall Street Journal), pack rat, comfy, reminds me to slow down and relax, warm, proud, falls asleep on the couch almost every night, cute, supports me in anything, my partner, could live off of snickers and slim-jims, bff, co-captain.

116

I went to the midwife today for my yearly exam and when I hopped on the scale I was surprised that it said I was 116. That means I'm 1 pound away from my goal of 115 pounds. I like being 115 - it's not too skinny and my clothes fit me best at that weight. I guess the breastfeeding is helping since I haven't been doing anything other than eating healthy and jogging in the evening. Score!

society

I've been listening to this song non-stop and while it does make me sorta sad, the lyrics are so great. I wish I could remember some of these lyrics when I get that itch to keep up with the jones'.

Society
It's a mystery to me
we have a greed with which we have agreed
You think you have to want more than you need
until you have it all you won't be free
society, you're a crazy breed
I hope you're not lonely without me
When you want more than you have, you think you need,
and when you think more than you want, your thoughts begin to bleed
I think I need to find a bigger place
'cos when you have more than you think
you need more space
society, you're a crazy breed
I hope you're not lonely without me
society, crazy and deep
I hope you're not lonely without me
there's those thinking more or less
less is more but if less is more how you're keeping score?
Means for every point you make your level drops
kinda like its starting from the top
you can't do that...
society, you're a crazy breed
I hope you're not lonely without me
society, crazy and deep
I hope you're not lonely without me
society, have mercy on me
I hope you're not angry if I disagree
society, crazy and deep
I hope you're not lonely without me.

Googie

Piper came home from school in her poopie outfit today. Too cute. Six months is SO fun. We both agree that she is so much more interactive and attentive and cuddly and fun now.

Every once in awhile I get an itch to move somewhere super hip. I rarely feel this way because I like our little life here in Jax. But whenever I visit Christa in SF it makes me want to pick up and move there. And visiting SA in Ann Arbor made me want to be in a more hip, college town. But then I come home and sit on our backporch with P and look out at our little park and think about all our friends who are just a few blocks away, and my parents just a few hours over and it reminds me of how homey and comfortable we are here.
Today one of our friends was complaining about Jacksonville and how lame it is and how if she moves away for a few years to take a new job that she can always come back "and everyone will be doing the same thing." This person isn't married, no kids and is still very much searching. I don't think she meant for it to sound harsh, but it sorta was. It made me think about how everyone is always searching for that super cool, different, hip road in life. We all have to have this wild, great story about what we do (cheese buyer for Whole Foods [my pick for awesome job], event planner in NYC, clothing designer) and all the places we've gone and the outrageous plans we have for the next year. There are all these destinations (Colorado, California, NYC,etc) that are the cool places to be and life will be so much more hip, rich, awesome if only we lived there. (Side note: I remember that when I was graduating from AU how everyone said they were moving to Colorado after graduation. It was totally the popular thing to do and when asked what their plans were after graduation, like 9 out of 10 people would say they were moving to Colorado. I don't think even half of them actually did.)
What's so wrong with being happy and content in our sweet house, taking walks around the neighborhood, setting down roots so that we have friends who love and rely on us, getting involved in our neighborhood, being thankful that we can afford to own a little piece of earth? I don't want to sound like a fun hater, and there's nothing wrong with dreaming big and doing fanastic stuff - I definitely have lots of fanastic stuff I plan on doing - but what's so bad with being happy and content with a simple, happy life?

And to be totally honest with myself, perhaps I'm just writing this to remind myself of all of this.

9/11

I can't believe its been 7 years since September 11. Patrick and I were living in Charleston, SC and were getting ready to move. We had sold off all our furniture to a College of Charleston exchange student and were sleeping in a sleeping bag in our living room. All that was left in the room was a big rug, our tv and our sleeping bag and I woke up that morning, reached up and turned the tv on to the TODAY show and laid back down. The first plane had already struck the first tower and I was so confused about what I was seeing. I nugged Patrick next to me and he woke up and watched with me. As it unfolded and the towers eventually fell I seriously started to lose it. When both towers fell I remember Katie Couric saying "we can only imagine the amount of lives that are being lost right now." There was so much misinformation coming across the tv at that point and we were being told one minute that there were 20,000 people in the towers and the next minute we were told that everyone got out safely. I remember seriously starting to panic - there were thousands of people in those towers and there was no way they were making it out. I just couldn't fathom or believe what we were watching with our own eyes take place. We could hear plane taking off from the Charleston air force base and zooming over our apartment. I remember having a real, honest fear that a bomb was going to fall on our city. I called my family and I remember my mom was really awkwardly calm, Sue Anne was visiting in Tallahassee and definitely understood the magnitude of what was going on. She was freaking and was calling the Red Cross to try and volunteer. Christa was living in Atlanta. I don't remember her reactions but I remember talking to her and being so nervous since Atlanta was a big city and they were saying on the tv that it could be a possible target. I vividly remember talking to my dad and I could hear the tension/fear/confusion in his voice. He kept saying "my god sweet thing, i just can't believe this is happening..." When my dad is nervous that makes me really nervous.
I remember the months and months of heart wrenching stories that came out about the people who died. I went to Ground Zero once when I was visiting Sue Anne and Jason in NYC. It was so moving to be there and see it with my own eyes.

Today I am so thankful for my family and our safety.

garden girl

We surprised Patrick by meeting him at the Cummer Museum http://www.cummer.org/ tonight after work. I love to walk the garden grounds there and try and get ideas for our yard. They were showcasing a new local artist in the museum who had tons of gorgeous paintings of Jacksonville and around Avondale. There were a ton of portraits of homes right down the street from us.

I had my first test in A&P today and it was pretty nerve wracking. I so hope I did well..I'll really be crushed if I didn't.

Pip is doing so great in her new school. The teachers are SO sweet and nice. Today when I picked her up Mrs. Pat asked me to bring in a family picture of all of us for next week b/c the babies will be talking about their families, what they mean to them, etc. uh...that is adorable and hilarious at the same time, seeing how they don't talk! I feel really good having her there and really appreciate the time I have to myself. My parents are coming in town this weekend to visit and see Piper eat real people food for the first time! I'm gonna make her some squash and avocado to try out. It's gonna be so cute.

I'm looking forward to getting a date night in with P while they are here too. I always feel totally refreshed and renewed after having good quality time with him.

P Diddy

Love this picture of him. See me?

swinging

First time in a swing. Patrick and I were much more excited than Pip.

Six Months!

Our sweet girl is six months old. I can not believe how fast time is flying.