41 weeks

I really did NOT think I would get to 41 weeks. The time spent in that week was marked with tears, frustration and the real worry that this baby might not ever come out. Physically I really felt fine - no back aches, no leg cramps, I wasn't really waddling, my stomach wasn't that big and I was sleeping pretty darn well. Mentally I was going nuts with all the questions from people who could really work on their delivery. One friend of ours kept sending me daily texts saying (and I quote) "Geez, what is up with your baby?" and "Uh, seriously is the kid still not here." and "Are you sure everything is okay with the baby?"

I went in for 2 non-stress tests and 2 fluid volume checks and the results kept coming back normal, and still no baby. After the second fluid volume check I went for a solo evening walk while my mom played with Piper at the playground. The air was cool and crisp for the first time and I hoofed my way around a 1 mile loop near my house. I had been pretty nervous about going into labor - I was anxious to meet our baby and desperate for him/her to arrive, but very much NOT looking forward to contractions and pain and the unknown. As I walked and pumped my arms and tried to really push myself so that maybe I could perhaps push myself into labor I felt a sense of confidence brewing. I hadn't been totally by myself in weeks and being alone and quiet and enjoying the fall air and the leaves changing I started to tell myself "it's all gonna work out, it's all gonna be okay". I took deep, yoga ujjayi breaths and I could feel the anxiety releasing a bit with each breath. The fear of labor and possible induction and stuff was still there, but I ended my little power walk knowing that everything was going to be okay and that yes, I CAN and WILL go through labor again and that a little miracle was coming to us.

Two days, 3 trips to have my membranes swept, 41.5 weeks of pregnancy and 2 ounces of castor oil later 6 pounds of love came roaring into our world. And I learned suddenly that yes, it is possible to love your second child just as fiercely and instantly as your first.